Saturday, July 30, 2011

Saturday evening edition

Tadi tengok filem pasal kes Claus von Bulow, Reversal of Fortune. Menarik juga cerita ini, Von Bulow dilakonkan oleh Jeremy Iron. Sangat bagus, no wonder he pocketed Oscar for this. Cerita pasal suami isteri yang curang mencurang, bunuh membunuh. When money is not a problem, everything is your problem.

Watak lawyer dalam cerita Reversal of Fortune sangat sangata mengingatkan aku dengan watak lawyer lakonan Sean Penn dalam Carlito's Way. Must be the frizzy hair kan.

Ayat yang aku paling suka dalam filem Reversal of Fortune ialah;

To love someone is easy. To live together is hard. You must work hard for it.

Well lebih kurang lah begitu ayatnya.

p/s: Isnin depan sudah puasa. Tidak sabar untuk ramadhan dan syawal. Someone is coming to the town :)

Friday, July 29, 2011

Red Hot Splendid Sun

I listen a lot of RHCP recently, and John left the band. I may know nothing about music, but I do know I am not the only one in this planet who like John's music. I have listened to the latest track from RHCP, kinda dance beat to my ears. May be I need sometimes to really love it.

I listen repeatedly to Hey. I think this awesome music is so underrated. It is sound so good, the lyric is so right in place. And I cant stop watching Can't Stop MV. One Minute Sculpture inspired video is so damn brilliant.

Amy Winehouse was dead. I wont pretend like I am her biggest fan. Because I am not. Before the death of Winehouse I have read about John's struggle to fight his addiction, which I thankful he did. So we can continuously enjoy fresh music from him. And then, Amy Winehouse died. I dont want to know why.

Amy Winehouse's voice was so honest. The feeling in her song is so pure. When she passed away, I think it is not just her is gone, but pieces of good music too.


I have read A Thousand of Splendid Suns by Khaleed H. I super like The Color Purple, but I honestly think I like A Thousand of Splendid Suns better. Much much better. I cried twice while reading, first when Mariam was executed, second when Laila reads the letter for Mariam from her father.

Thank you Khaleed for this amazing and beautifully written story.

When I read the novel, I also read article about child brides in Nat Geo magazine. We think our live is hard... well... think again. Imagine, 14 years old, illiterate, married to 40 years old, and a mother of two.

I am thankful and happy I was born in Malaysia.

Marriage can wait, education cannot. (ok, this will ignite kutuks)

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Sunday post

When I was doing my final year back in late 2006 to first quarter of 2007, I liked to read murders and serial killers story. I bought few books on the related matter, as far as I know Jeff Dahmer, Ted Bundy, and Charles Manson are the ever popular murderous men. Serial killers encyclopedia is incomplete without their names.

So today, I pick up one of the books and read about IRA man and also about Dahmer. I realize I misplaced the first book about serial killers I ever bought. Try to find it on my family's bookshelf but no avail. I keep on misplacing stuffs especially my books these days. I still yet find two suitcases full with my notes from college, which I may need for my lecture. I really need my Systematics notes.

It is good to read again. I feel so narcoleptic in these recent weeks. I think the most probable cause would be the series of diarrhea, then I dont know, may be the hormone or something. I try to eat well, cut down carbo intake, but I often indulge myself with soda drinks. And I cook. Yes, ladies and gentlemen I cook.

Recently, I read a lot about Evolution, the comparative theories, evolution and thermodynamic, basically anything about evolution. I try to limit my scope from pre Darwinian to Darwinian. I need to put all those things together, stripped them even in the sense of my students can comprehend. I dont read The Origin of Species just for the heck of it. I read it because I teach theory of evolution. I found the notes about evolution in STPM books are often misleading. So dont read those books to study about evolution.

Trust me, stuff I read is really sleep-inducing. I wont blame my students if any of them decide to take a nap during my lecture.


Things are flowery now between me and my guy. We act like 16 years old sometimes, I dont know how long these flowery bits are going to last. I enjoy this, hope so does he. Long distance dating is something your teleco would like you to do, my phone bill explains this claim better than I could.

I like when he told me about the domestic stuffs he did, like laundry, cooking, housekeeping. I know, it sounds silly and trivial, but sound very normal to me. I want a normal relationship, less drama, just ordinary thing. I dont need this thematic love story, or close imitation of a romantic love film e.g. Cinta and Rangga, string of Indonesian romantic films, Nur Kasih etc etc.

May be we dont have this lengthy romantic story to tell. We are not romantic, we dont even celebrate birthdays, we are typical people doing typical things, birthdays are typical too, just we dont do birthdays. But I glad I said hi to him in the lecture hall 8 years ago. Always :)

p/s: Buka-buka internet, Amy Winehouse meniggal, RIP Amy. Thanks for the music.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

May be I'll delete this later.

Tiba2 mau tulis pasal ini, I dont know why exactly. One thing I dont like about marriage practice in Malaysia is, it is too husband oriented. It is almost all about husband, husband, husband. Aku cakap in Malaysian sense, sebab aku tahu di kawasan seperti Afghanistan, Pakistan, Amerika, Belanda dan tempat2 lain mungkin lebih lain amalanannya.

And how much we emphasize the ownership, the husband owns the wife. His wife, bini orang, isteri dia. Jaga makan minum suami, is a statement that usually induce WTF response from me. Makan minum tanggungjawab suami. Suami memang memiliki isteri, tapi preferable lagi jika dikatakan Suami bertanggungjawab kepada isteri and vice versa.

Tulis lebih2 nanti orang tuduh tak mengikut lunas agama pula kan. I value relationship more than I fancy ownership. And being happy. Ini belum kira lagi orang prepare for wedding more than they prepare themselves for marriage. I always believe the power to say yes is equal to the power to say no. Say whatever you want, decide whatever you like, but do the right thing at the right time.

Marriage is not only something you get, but is also about let something go.

Damn, now I feel like hell!


Aku post semasa waktu pejabat. Hidup boleh jadi seharam ini, siapa sangka bukan? Maka, peace out aku nak buat skema jawapan soalan final exam. Dan berharap hidup kurang keharamannya.

Sunday, July 17, 2011


Ini ialah pos ke 999.

1) Sesiapa belum tengok The Fighter, sila tengok. Selain itu, sudah tengok Prince of Persia and 127 hours. All are syok movies.. Prince of Persia slightly below the par. But Ok. Some movies are worth to not watching (betul kah apa aku tulis ni?)
2) I bought new pair of jeans. Kali terakhir beli pada bulan Ogos 2007, during my graduation. The old pair masih boleh pakai, I love it. I beli more pairs lepas gaji this month :)
3) My old man is getting better. Alhamdullilah. You are awesome Big Boss!
4) My uncle and aunt said, it is better to finish my study before think about marriage. Err... I graduated twice already. Yeah.. 2007 and 2010. TWICE. And still I haven't finish my study. I dont mind about the marriage thing, I guess no matter how hard I study, people still think I shall remain in school.
5) I really need to buy a new car. And go to Kudat.
6) Razman, I miss you so much.
7) I wish I write a better post than this.
8) I have to watch my spending. Yeah.. four figured expenses in less than a month is waaayyyyy too much. I shop like Arab Emir comes out from a dessert with petrodollars to burn.
9) I want to buy a watch. Watches may be.. (hey what happen with watch the spending?)
10) I bought a new ring. It is silver. Fits my right finger ring well. Even told Razman about it. Im happy with my rings. The gold and the silver.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011


Serabut sangat sangat. Apart from easy job of mine, my mind is cluttered with so many things.

1) My car needs to be fixed. AGAIN.
2) I want to buy a new car, but cannot decide when or what kind of car that fit me well.
3) My father is sick. Hopefully everything will be just fine. I urged him to do colonoscopy, the sooner the better.
4) I finally get the formal invitation from the organizer of a seminar, which will be held in Indonesia. BUT the Seminar is next week. I haven't purchase air ticket. With my father's current condition. I dont think I can make it to the seminar.
5) Meet the parents problem. Yeah.. it is harder than I think it is.
6) Just now I have decided, if thing is not working out between us. I'll let him go, and buy more guitars. Bass guitar especially. Fuck it. I dont care.
7) I want to go to Kudat.
8) I am bloody tired. I've been working non stop since January. I took 3 days off in January. That's it. I've been working continuously for half of year.
9) My office is turning into sanctuary. Where I meet less people, and start reading everything I want to read. Magazines, novels, text books, journals, my own notes, blogs, status updates, tweets, wikipedia, online articles. Sometimes I think I spend most of my day reading stuffs. And they pay me to do this.
10) I miss those days, when I was more scientific, easier life, when he was just another guy friend of mine, watch more tv, less drama, and whatever. I dont even watch tv these days.. I am just like any girls, who could be very stupid when liking a guy.

The easiest thing right now is my job. That's it. I like this easy task of mine, even it takes most of my time (if not life). It's ok, now it is good to get busy.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

July: Birthdays, a death, and a wedding.

1. Birthdays: Kamarul, Nel, Razman, and my lil brother are July babies. Happy birthday bros. Wish you guys prosperity and good health. Nel is no longer with us. Al Fatihah, moga kau bahagia di sana. I miss you always. Of course things are different now with Razman. Well... slightly.

2. My nenek saudara passed away last thursday. May Allah SWT bless her soul and place her among the believers. My condolences to her husband and children.

3. My colleague, Hafiz is no longer lelaki bujang kacak (as he said) because now he is happily married, and gladly rub it to all over our faces (and also facebook's wall). Congratulation to you brother, people said, good thing comes to those who wait. You certainly, have been waiting long enough (12 years of relationship!). May marriage brings all excitements and true happiness to both of you. May you have love in one another, walk into new experience hand in hand, enjoy the mystery together for many more years. And stay in love till the end of time.

I hate wedding. Tapi untuk kali ini, sangat excited untuk pergi. Siap pilih2 baju. Bangun pukul 4.30 am on the day, pergh kau... hahaha... sangat sangat mahu pergi. Pengantin cool, aku pula yang excited rabak. Not just me, our friends, Bapa Kumbang pun sama, went to my room asked for what to wear. I couldnt focus at work. I went to the nikah ceremony. It was... how to say it? It was awesome!. I like it.

Tahniah again to Hafiz and his wife.

p/s: trust me I still hate wedding. But I can make exception.

p/s/s: I wont make this post exclusively yours, because I did. In fact there are too many you-related posts lately, even my tumblr is turning into I-Miss-My-Boyfriend weeping page.

Friday, July 8, 2011

If today is your birthday

Happy Birthday!


Magenta make love to me
Because I love you
Don't be jealous Brown
You too, can make love to me
Remember, I love you first
And always

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Absurd Randomness

"The most beautiful place in the world is Kudat"
"The second most beautiful place in the world is KK"
"The happiest place in the world?"

"I think by replacing his name with a girl's name would make people suspect me involve in a gay relationship. I am not gay"
"How could people suspect you involve in a gay relationship by only reading your text messages? Hmmm.... Unless..."
"Yeah, unless..."

"Releks bah. Kenapa serius sangat juga ni? Don't you just.... Wait... Don't tell me..."

"Hey... Marriage can wait, education cannot"
"Kau jangan Jill.. Nanti..."
"I don't say that, a novel does"
"Kau, nanti kau...."
"Yeah, I know, now you are keeping the deposit, you just wait to pay me back later kan? BIG TIME!"
"Kau, nanti kau... Aku tulis (a banner) 'Kahwin can wait, education cannot' Gantung di SST "
*Laugh burst*

Sunday, July 3, 2011


Me, drive. You, sleep. The radio, off.
I like that.

Walk. Sit. Say nothing.
I like that.

Easter weekend:
Beautiful beach. Beautiful morning. Say nothing.
I like that.

Sit. Eat. Shut up.
I like that.

Ask. Stunned. Yes.
I like that (kot? hahaha).

When you are with me, your presence creates silence.
I super like that.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Me Too

I never say, me too.
But trust me, me too.
Me too, wholeheartedly.