Thursday, April 22, 2010

I got a (bad) feeling

Something really wired had happened on last tuesday's night. Aku macam biasa main internet. Masa tu dah pukul 1-2 pagi. Aku belum sembahyang isya lagi. So, aku pergi ambil wuduk. All of sudden masa ambil wuduk, badan aku sejuk seram semacam, like very shivering, takut gila2, sampai aku panik. I was very very afraid. And that night for the first time, I was hoping I have someone to sleep with me. I always prefer to sleep alone. But, well... I was scared like hell.

So I called my sister, but she was sleeping (obviously at 2 am). I was panic, sebab tanpa sebab musabab, badan aku sejuk menggigil, and my heart was pumping like super engine. I was very scared. So, I called my brother, nasib baik he was near by, so I asked him to wait for me, I wanted to go back to Putatan, that very night. At 2 am.

Earlier that day, I went out with few friends for dinner. Nothing really special, just an ordinary dinner. My day was pretty much ordinary, I went to lab, managed to settle load of works. Very much normal. But I had very bad feeling earlier this week. I cant explain how or why, but it was a bad bad feeling. Very bad. Sebab tu tiada mood sangat shopping plus, according to pesan orang2 tua, jangan gembira berlebihan nanti menangis. Maka aku berjimba ala kadar saja lah. Lagipun memang bad feeling sejak 2-3 hari lagi.

So I went back to Putatan around 2.30. Escorted by my brother. On wenesday's noon, I went back to ums to get some stuff and meet friends.

Bad feeling makes me feel afraid rather than bad. After series of death (family of friends, and artist) recently, I take bad feeling seriously. I drove back to kampung at 3.30++ on wenesday. I was sleepy, alone in the car, and the radio didnt really work. Alhamdulliah, arrived safely at home after 1 hour or so driving. Soon after I reached the main gate, there was an obituary announcement from our near by surau, I dont know who was the deceased. But a death. Again.

Daripada-Nya kita datang dan kepada-Nya kita akan kembali.

Death is a normal event. And it is normal to afraid of it. I am. I admit, I have trouble in handling death.

Al-Fatihah kepada yang telah pergi.

p/s: selepas kematian Achik Spin, aku selalu teringat lagu bola-bola api. Takziah kepada keluarga arwah.

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