Thursday, February 18, 2010

been there done that.

well not yet.

Following is unofficial acknowledgements and some thought of my journey.

Alhamdulillah, Syukur kepada ALLAH SWT. I have submitted my final draft. Feel like a mother. Yes, I have sent my final draft, to the Pasca. Now I am waiting for D-Day. The judgement day. My viva voce.

To balance the drama, actually my dissertation is merely partial fulfillment for obtaining the M. Sc. Another half portion is (or was) in the form of courses. I have done my courses about ehem.. almost a year ago. So, I am unofficially finish my study.

There are three students by coursework in my batch. Yes, small class. I am the first to submit. Contrary to popular belief, M. Sc. by coursework is not as easy as people think it is. To be fair, it is not hard either, just it is not THAT easy.

I have to admit, completing courses (classes and exams) is not really that hard. BUT to complete 9 credit hours dissertation project is another story. The workload of dissertation is not as much as Full Thesis project (minimum 2 years). BUT the pain is almost the same.

I have friends who completed their M. Sc. by coursework within 1 year. It is awesome to graduate so soon and so young with second degree. I wanted too. But I couldnt. I accepted that.

Since I couldnt graduate within 1 year, anyhow. I try to gain more than just a certificate. That the least I could do, to sugar my sour heart. I aimed for publication. I have one in press now. I am thankful for it. It was dedicated to my friend, Rafiq, as he was (more or less) the first person who I told that I wanted to publish something by the time I am graduating. I did. And I emailed him the manuscript. And I really want to publish my dissertation result. In house or local journal is enough for me. I know, my data are bodoh-bodoh, so no need to go to High Impact journal to publish mine.

I am also forever in debt with my father. He is the one who galvanizing my study with his money. Yes, you really need money to obtain certificate. This is fact.

I have official sponsor,who I couldnt really rely on, as their money is always one semester delay. But better late than never, thank you. (and I forgot to mention my sponsor in my official acknowledgements).

So, whenever my sponsor delay to cash in their money in my account, I have my father('s money) to back me up. And my mother's money sometimes. Especially in wardrobe department. Yes, my mom buys me clothes all the time. She and my sister LOVE to dress me up (And now SILs join the duo). If I asked them to buy me black, green, and orange tudungs, they will buy me, black, green, orange, plain pink, pink-black-white, black-white, magenta, black-green, another black tudungs, purple and orange tshirts, and white-stripped grey dress shirt. If I want black baju kurung, mom buys me black, purple, orange, and green baju kurungs. And sister and sils buy me matched tudungs for my baju kurungs. Always extra. If I want white t-shirt. They buy me white and red t shirt, because I dont have red t-shirt. That's why I seldom go shopping. I have enough clothes.

Therefore, not just Anuar Zain is the lucky one. Me too.

Thank you and love you (oh.. not you Anuar).

I am lucky, my siblings always pay for my dinner and lunch (especially my SILs). Another reason for me to be extra grateful. And they let me use their shampoo, shower gel, detergent, eat their food, drink their drinks, watch their astro, use their internet, whenever I go to Putatan (My family's second residence). And also pay for my movie tickets and popcorn sometimes (err... most of the time)

In my case, My parents and family back me up financially and plus plus (err.. prayers, blessings, bla bla bla... the doa part I owe my mom A LOT). I have been driving three cars within 2 years. I mean, I have been borrowing three cars within 2 years. The first and foremost the green kancil (my brother's). I hate the colour, it is too psychedelic. I hate the lowered suspension. I hate the whole modification. But this is the car I love the most. walaupun bergegar-gegar if I press more than 80km/hr. Second, my sister's black myvi, used it almost 2 weeks. Simple. Spacious, the least tinted. ok lah. And now the old waja. well it is Proton, the window is always be the culprit, need extra caution with the sometimes overheated engine. the leaking motor oil, and I dont know how to open the hood. the doors.. dont let me start with the doors.... HATE the doors. Overall, better than naik bas lah kan. Terima apa yang ada. (minta Camry pun bukan boleh dapat kan..).

My parents and family provide me with whatever I need (not what I want). I love and thank them for that. It is more than enough actually.

Of course I need extra support system. I am blessed, in my journey to finish my study (Drama again~) I have meet selfless, helpful, generous people. First my lunch buddies, actually they are more than just my lunch buddies, they are my pseudocoursemates, my labmates, and we are each others' unpaid therapists (tempat meluah perasaan antara satu sama lain). Second, my Hausmet Angkat, the 9-15 crowd. my real (ex) hausmets, the 5-7 semi-d crowd, the kingfisherians.

I have a lot to thank to...

Allah SWT, gives me good health, sends me good people, and rezeki here and there. Alhamdulillah. Spiritually, I cant judge myself, but there is a lot of space need to be improved.

Financial factor is one of the most important factor in study. May be come after the willingness and the opportunity to further study. You cant study if you are not willing, you cant study if you dont have opportunity, and you cant study without proper finance.

the big three would be;

1. willingness
2. opportunity
3. finance finance finance

I am thankful, I have all.

Beside those 3, you need religion, support system (parents&family), extra support system (fellow post grads&friends).

3. religion
I dont know others. but I am blessed with Islam. I am thankful I am muslim.

when you say curse and profane words more than often. you need to ask for forgiveness. you need religion.

4.parents& family
Blood is thicker than water and money (but sometimes money is thicker). Love my parents and family beyond words.

5. fellow post grads.
these fellows endure the same shits as you do. so most of the time they know what they are talking about, (most, not all the time). Technically, because of the situation, they understand you better than others. So listen to them and talk to them. They may help you to solve your problems or pave way to solve it. And I am lucky I have good extra support system. my small crowd of friends are my personal cheerleaders. Thank you.

may be some of you rubbishing my say. But this is my thought after 2 rollercoaster years. 2 years... and what next?


ORIAJ said...

lepas ni boleh celebrate menunu ayam di pasir pastu tidur dalam kimah

Jlascanteen said...

jan ingau... I have 3 parties to throw (at least) but wait until I survived my ehem Viva Voce.

nurul khairunie said...


Jlascanteen said...

Nurul: terima kasih.