all of sudden, I think about target in my life, other than wrap up my study with scroll. Married is totally off the table, so leave it there, but first I want to have a real proper job.
What if, I cant (get proper job)? so when I was brushing my teeth just now, I have planned my plan B. Which is, I will hunt for job, and if I cant score any proper job within 1-2 years, I will resume my study. Not in science, but law. Where? I dont know.
My father wants me to be a lawyer. ALWAYS. Even after my graduation in 2007, he is still hoping I will choose to enroll in law school, but I didnt, I choose to stick with my field, the very field I am struggling with right now.
Sometimes last year, I was browsing few pamphlets of college and university, other than looking for potential place to do my next degree in science, I was also peeping if there is opportunity for me to study law in one of those colleges. Nothing serious, more like a 'window shopping'. He almost instantly agree if I want to register in any law school at any time.
Doing M.Sc wasnt really his first choice, but mine. His first choice is always, get my ass a seat in any law school.
Now I reconsider that option. I never say never to law school. It is not like I want to be a lawyer, but I am interested to study law. Yes, not practicing, studying. I think these two are different things, right?
As far as I can recall, first he wants my first brother to study law, but didnt happen, his first son read business instead. When I finished high school, he hinted, he wants me to choose form 6 and then, enroll in law school. But I didnt, I choose heaven and hell matriculation program, then ended in Bangi for 3 years. He never really wanted my other siblings to study law though. Just me and first bro.
now, I am 24 years old, 25th next October, I spent half of my 20's decade in schools, so... I dont know. It is not like he forces me to read law, but he never really stop either, still hoping one day I will read law.
The mambo jumbo between me, my father, and law school, reminds me a scene in 3. Remember, the scene when Corleone's son told his father he wanted to quit law school, and how Corleone insisted his son not to.
a part time job vacancy knocks my lab door today. Sounds interesting and tiring. I think the offer is still open, but I dont want to yang di kejar tak dapat yang di kendong berciciran. Though the job requires you to demonstrate/monitor lab for 3 hours a day, still the preparation usually takes at least 1 hour prior the real periods, so about added another 1-2 hours, means about 3-4 hours per day. With my race with time to finish my volume, I must say, it is too ambitious and greedy. The money is good, just need extra times and extra patience to claim it.
If I take the job, I dont know if I can juggle my current lab work with additional 3 hours. well that' s a lot of lab works.
I am just kinda lost right now. Luckily sometimes I find refuge at 9-15. Thanks peeps. They are good people, who are willing to accept a social desperado like me.
anyway, the McD cashier asked me whether I live in Neuyork. I reluctantly said yes, well.. I am living in Neuyork. She said she saw me driving the black car (which is belong to my sister). Again, I reluctantly, verified that was me. But I told her, I am no longer driving the car, it was just for that particular week.
See... clearly, I eat at McD more than often, at least often enough to have small talk with the cashier there. And people are starting noticed my presence here, in Neuyork.
Which I prefer if they dont.
p/s: Pardon my pathetic English. I am trying...
Rasa best dengan apa yang ada.
19 hours ago